DeQuincy, LA — In a Louisiana courtroom today, 15-year-old Paul Horner broke down in tears after a judge found the young man guilty on two counts of domestic terrorism and was sentenced to twenty-five years to life in federal prison. Horner is the first person in history to be charged with what is known as […]
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Hollywood, CA — Breaking Bad fans around the world are celebrating the stunning, glorious and amazing news announced today: Walter White is not dead, and there will indeed be a sixth season of the wildly-popular, award-winning AMC drama. This shocking and exciting news comes not from an internet message board or the rumor mill but […]
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Menlo Park, CA — The Facebook Drug Task Force or FDTF, will begin monitoring all Facebook postings and messages of its users for drug activity beginning October 1st. Chairman and chief executive of Facebook, Inc., Mark Zuckerberg, spoke with CNN about the FDTF. “The task force was created to keep users of Facebook safe,” Zucckerberg said. […]
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Menlo Park, CA — Beginning October 1st, Facebook will be implementing a drug task force designed to arrest those who buy and sell narcotics while using the online social networking site. Facebook is calling the group the Facebook Drug Task Force, or FDTF, and will be monitoring all postings and messages created by its users. […]
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Huntsville, AL — A 31-year-old pregnant woman, wife and mother of three, was brutally murdered after she was seen working on Sunday, or the Sabbath, by a fellow member of the church. Brandy Hull, a devoted member of ‘Paul Church’, a church which takes the Bible literally, was working at ‘Hank’s Bass Pro Shop’ on […]
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Christian Anti-Masturbation Group Sues Other Christian Anti-Masturbation Group For $350 Million Claiming Trademark InfringementThursday August 7th, 2014 04:38:53 AM Jimmy Rustling
Creve Coeur, MO — A federally funded Christian anti-masturbation organization claims that another federally funded Christian anti-masturbation organization has violated their intellectual property and is now suing for millions. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin and their parent organization Stop Masturbation Now have accused Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Shark of using the same name of their famous dolphin […]
Washington, DC — In a press conference at the White House today, President Barack Obama announced his controversial decision to raise the minimum drinking age from 21 to 24 years of age. “We need to work harder to protect the young people in this country,” Obama told reporters. “Our young folks are dying from alcohol […]
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Phoenix, AZ — Arizona Governor Jan Brewer announced her controversial decision today granting a full pardon to 35-year-old Phoenix resident Paul Horner, known to his thousands of followers as Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin. Horner made world news last month after his ironic arrest for public masturbation. “I did a lot of soul searching before making […]
The post Governor Jan Brewer Pardons Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin For Masturbating In Public appeared first on Super Official News.
Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation organization was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The group recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of masturbation. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, […]
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